Songs with Our Stars
by Endlesswriter03
Summary: Hazel's dream has always been to go to Harvard and she even won a scholarship, but it all had to be put on hold when she got sick with cancer. Years later, she is finally getting to live her dream of Harvard. However, this was not the ride she expected for herself.
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Songs to our stars

I am changing this chapter because I am not happy with it. I hope you enjoy this ride because this story is so fun for me to write. It will be a little different with a few mew characters as well as plots and twists. I hope I can make you proud.

So I want to thank you all for whoever reads this story!

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Prologue

I sat at the counter and I turned around in my seat Dalton's was filled to the brim with people. It made me happy to see it this way. People where laughing and chatting while eating their meals. It was a wonderful sight and up on the stage was a person singing as it was karaoke night, which is always an popular night here in town. I look around the place as I notice some small details of how I came to be here tonight and what a story it is. It was also my fifth wedding anniversary to my wonderful husband who was currently in the back cooking and I smiled as I had a little secret to tell him later when we are alone in our home. I could not believe how life has blessed me in such away when just a short time ago it could have turned completely different with me in buried into the ground. It soon would be my turn to go up to the mic to introduce the next singer as the current song came to a close.

They were not bad in the least but were little off tune, but that is not what this night is ever about. Karaoke night was a night where people could have fun and not worry about whether they sang good or bad. If anyone were to get booed by an audience member, that member was asked to leave. It also can be where people tell stories as well. I walk up to the stage as i applauded the singer who gracefully bowed before leaving the exit.

"Way to go," I said in the mic as everyone else join me and I see my wonderful husband walk out from the back looking as graciously handsome as ever and I caught his blue eyes that I loved so much.

"I just want to take a moment and to welcome everyone to Dalton's night whether regular customers or one who are passing through. I hope you enjoy yourself tonight while enjoying some great food, wonderful entertainment, and memories to last a life time," I said as many people smile at me. "Who would like to go next?"

"How about you tell us a story?" asks my Husband.

"What story would that be?" I asked adoringly.

"The one everyone love to hear," He smiled.

"Where should I start?" I asked.

"How about at the beginning?" He said his eyes sprawling.

"I can do that," I say as I pull up a stool to sit on as the story can be quite long. Never breaking eye contact with him and he mouths "I love you." I smile at him in response.

"My name is Hazel Grace Waters," I say in the mic. "And Augustus Waters is the star cross love of my life." I say nodding to him as he took a seat himself. " You see I fell in love with him the way you fall asleep. Slowly, then all at once. Our story is an epic romance and I may not be able to tell our story without bursting into a puddle of tears. But, I'll give it my best shot." My eyes on the man who has stolen my heart as I begin to lose myself in the story as I began.

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I hope this is better because to be honest the perivous was not up to my standards.

Enjoy.


	2. Chapter 1

_Six years_ _earlier_

"Hazel Lancaster!"

I quickly look up at the sound of my name. I toss the boring magazine that I had flipping through while I was waiting to be call, getting up and grabbing a hold of my oxygen tank to drag it with me as I go. As I walk I feel almost every eye on my body and tank. You think I would have gotten used to that longing a pitiful looks that come my way but I don't. It really wants to make me crawl under a rock and hide. However, I gracefully ignore them as I stop before my nurse who was greeting me with a warm smile as she turned around for me to follow.

"Hi Hazel," she says as points to the chair for me to sit down and she also follows suit in her own chair. She flip through my thick chart before adding a new sheet.

"Hi," I say with equal warmness as I received.

"How are you today?" She said as she wrote down on the paper before logging in to the computer on her desk.

"I am good," I answered as I sat down crossing my legs in the big comfy chair. I wish I could have this chair at home I would sit in it all the damn time.

"Alright, you are here for your biweekly blood test am I correct?" asked Judy as she went over the standard medical history questioning.

"Yes," I say nodding feeling slightly awkward even thought I knew I should not be. I had been here several time over the last couple of years.

"What was your diagnosis?" she asked.

"Acute Myeloid Leukemia," I answered. I will get to that story later.

I have to come here every two week, and you would think that they would remember everything, but no. It is never that easy as I have come to learn in my life.

"Status?" she asked as she continued to write.

"I am remission going on 14 months," I say with a slight distaste in my mouth. Every time about my remission status I always feel as I am going to jinx myself .

"Thank you," She said as she got out of her chair to get the thing for my test. She soon wrapped the big blue rubber band around my upper arm and tied it very tightly making wince a little.

"I am sorry," She said as she began to say something else the sound of my ring tone filled the air. My first instinct is to answer it but I stopped quickly by the stern look of my nurse. She hated when people would get on their cell phones. It would have to wait until later. It was just probably my boyfriend Warner, whom I have been seeing for almost a year, but I am going to have to tell him about Harvard.

Yes, I said Harvard. They have a song-writing course that they offer and I am going to finally be able to take it. I am so excited as I have been wanting to take this course for as long as I can remember. I was supposed to go to Harvard at the age of 17 but apparently, there was a different plan for me. I was diagnosed at the age of 16 three months after I had been awarded a full Music Scholarship to Harvard. After that, my life went completely down hill.

Anyway, back to Harvard. I will be leaving my parents who lived about an hour from the campus and down town Boston. I will be starting as a freshman finally.

"We are all done," Judy says breaking me away from the thoughts flowing through my mind

"We're done?" I asked shocked. "I didn't feel I thing," I smile as looked at my arm, which was completely bandaged. I did not even feel the as I hardly ever do whenever Judy takes my blood. I am really going to miss her when I leave.

"Yes, my dear. You are free to go and make sure you get you packet for Dr. Hamburg's office when you leave for Boston in a couple of weeks." She said as she gives me a sucker from her candy jar. I smile I take it thanking her for it before she wraps me up in an embrace.

"Good luck, baby girl," She says with a slight hitch in her voice. I smile at warmly. She was one of favorite people on the planet. I was truly luck to have made her acquaintance in my short life.

"Thank you for everything," I say as I kicked back my cart and walked up to the front desk to check out.

Shortly after I left the office, well pretty much in the parking lot I dig out my phone from my pocket to check the missed call and sure enough it was Warner who called me. I quickly hit the call button before putting the phone to me ear. He answered after a few rings.

"Hey poobear," he answered making me giggle at the name. I actually hated the nickname, but I was not about to tell him that.

"Hey," I said slowly.

"How did the appointment go?" he asked.

"It was just blood work. It was really nothing major," I said as I spotted our car where my mother was currently waiting for me.

"So the reason I called earlier, was to see if you wanted to get bite to eat later?" He asked. I hear something in the background another voice it seemed.

"Who is that?" I asked

"Just my mom," He answered quickly.

"Well I would be delighted to go out with you tonight," I said as I enter the car with my mom eyeing my every move.

"Great, see you then pooh bear," he said before hanging up the phone. It made me cringe as it was twice in one phone call.

Mom starts the car and before we were even on the highway she starts showering me with questions, but I could only think about the upcoming night.

I met Warner at my cancer center when he was with his mom during one of her chemo treatment for her breast cancer. It was not completely love at first sight, but friends at first and then one day he asked me out for dinner and here we are today. I felt it was going well and I was looking forward to the next step whatever that was. We were taking it slow as I was finishing chemo when we first met and was the reason we have never made it to third base. Chemo rather kills that side of you, even though I have never had such an experience with anyone as of yet. Yes, I am a virgin, but I also want to wait for marriage, but then again I may never live to see that day.

We pull up to my parent home, as well as my childhood home, where my dad was sitting on the porch reading the daily newspaper. He came down to greet us as we got out of the car. I had a little bit more difficulty getting out because of my tank and my dad rushed around the car to help me.

"Dad, I am fine," I say with frustration lacing my tone. I really tired to be independent show that I could show my parents that I will be fine by myself at Harvard.

"I don't mind helping you honey," He said calmly as help up his hands. He smiled as he looked over me searching for something.

"Dad it has only be a couple of hours," I said softly his eyes softened upon me.

"I know," He said opening the door with us following through. I was welcomed with scent of homemade chili in the slow cooker. My stomach clenched with hunger from the wonderful smell as I sat down on a stool at counter as I watched my dad take the lid off to stir the red goodness. I was hit by a stronger wave of chili and this time mouth started to water. My dad noticed my stare and chuckled lightly. I always loved his laugh and it made me almost cave.

"No thanks," I said shaking my head as he started shaking some seasoning in to it before tasting it himself.

"She has a date tonight Michael," Frannie says as she takes a seat next to me as my face filled up with a blushing flame.

"How is good old Warner?" asked Dad.

"Well," I said as my heart jumped slightly at the thought of his smile.

"Let me have a taste," said Mom as she reached to take the spoon from her husband and put it in her mouth. As I sat there, watching them go back and forth on how much salt was or not need. They often argued over that little detail a tune struck up in my mind.

"Excuse me," I say politely as I grabbed my tank to hurry as fast as I can go or my sucky lungs allow before I lose the melody. I could be doing nothing when words or chord randomly fill my head and I always have to write them down or I will lose out on a potential song. Once I was up the stairs and I had to stop to catch up on my breath as stairs are my worst enemy sometimes, but I do not let them stop me in fact I refuse them too.

I walked over to my lovely keyboard as well as my soundboard. They were wonderful presents from my parents for my half birthdays since I never really celebrate my annual because I never know if I will see the next one. These two things were my pride and joy along with my songbook. I have many songbooks, as I have been writing songs since kindergarten. I still have everyone as I look over to my bookcase where they currently lined the shelves as long with my other books as well as my favorite novel: An Imperial Affliction by Peter Van Houten. It is a book about cancer, but not a book about cancer. It is hard explain but it connects to me really well.

I sit down as I float my fingers over the keys as the sound hits me. It was not quite right so I tried it in another chord. I almost have and soon I was long in the notes. The thing about my song writing is that I feel free. Free from cancer and oxygen tanks and in a world of my own.

"Hazel! Warner's here!" yelled my mom up the stairs. I snap my neck over to the clock and the numbers 6:00 blare right at me in their angry red color.

"Shit!" I said outloud as I scrambled to get ready. He hated to be late and I was going to make him really late; dragging my cart with I go into my closet to find something suitable for tonight and all I see is comfort close. I really don't know what hell I am doing here because I never ever where dresses. I have one dress but that is not for a date, but much darker date if you know what I mean. I do own a simple black skirt, which I chose, and a red shirt with black ballet shoes. I stop and sit down on my bed as I am moving way too fast and I now I am breathless with pain grasping my lungs. They were warning me to slow myself down, but I just do not have the time.

Once I was dressed at the speed my body allowed I looked at myself in the mirror and I cringe at the image. All I see was a pale face littered with brown freckles a page boy hair cut. It has taken my hair a long time to get to its length because my hair grew back so slowly after chemo. I have wigs that I can wear but those things itch like crazy so they never stay on. I also see a big tube called a cannula stuck up my nose. I am not what you call attractive in the slightest bit. I run my hand though my hair with hopes that it would behave for tonight but nope it just flops back down in its spot. I shake my head as I was tired of looking at myself.

"Honey are you okay?" asked my mom startling me. I placed a hand on my now fast beating heart.

"Yeah I am fine. I was just finishing up," I said with a smile as she returned before she held up a small necklace with a red tear drop.

"Grandma's necklace?" I asked in awe.

"Yes ma'am," She said as she walked up behind me to put on for me. Once she was done she wrapped her arms around me holding her.

"I love you so much," She said softly with a proud gleam in her eye,

"Me too," I say back. I am so lucky to have her as my mother. She was also my best friend and my hero. I do not how see did it with my illness over the years but it made me envy of the courage she had in her. I wish I could be just like he.

"Now lets go," She said. "You have a very handsome young man waiting for you down stair."

I nodded as kicked back my tank and left my room, but not before I walked back to my piano to hit the save button. I smiled knowing that it was safe before I really did follow my mom down the stairs one at a time. There he was, Warner Levington, standing there in a gray suit with his hair greased back in the sexy way that I like and he greeted me with smile.

"Finally,' He said. He had a edge to his tone, but hopefully my dad did not notice so he would go all protective ape on him. I know it was because I made us late.

"Sorry I was writing again," I said looking down no knowing what I was apologizing for as he knew what my writing meant to me.

"Oh poohbear," He sighed shaking his head. I cringed inwardly at the pet name and I really had to bite down on my lip so I would not retort back at him.

"Well I m ready now," I say as I wrapped my arm around his much larger one as we were walking out the door I turned back to wave at my parents who were watching me from the door as we walked towards his sliver car which was waiting for us on the street. He never did like parking in the way. Warner was weird like that.

"Don't be home to late," mom called from the porch as Warner opened the door for me as I climbed in sort of clumsy like due to my ever-loving tank. Oh how I wish I could sink gracefully in a car again.

"I won't!" I said blowing them a kiss. They waved us off as Warner drove off to a wonderful night. Little did I know that this would be where my story truly began. My story on love and becoming a different person I never thought I would be.

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Little Author note: This story is going to be a little different. It is very A/U. I did use Warner from Legally blonde! I hope you love this story because I loved writing this chapter. For those who stay with me you are the best. You will see Augustus soon and it will be a slow kind of romance. So stay tuned.


	3. Chapter 2

I do not own this wonderful book: The Fault in Our stars! It just merely for entertainment purposes and fun!

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I feel a strong case of giddiness overcome my entire being as Dalton's, my favorite restaurant in the whole world, filled my line of eyesight. The atmosphere was nothing but full on comforting and warm. The food was nothing short than fabulous as homemade Italian food goes. I have been coming here with my parents since I was little and it was where Warner and I had our first date. I would also come here to get out of the house and come here write songs when I just wanted to get mind off cancer for a little. Another reason this place was so great was due to the owner ever so loving Dalton Adessi, who like another grandfather to me.

It took Warner a while to find a parking spot as the restaurant was filled to the brink almost. This was a popular sight here on a Friday night. Warner made his way around the car to open the door and help me out. I know that he is just trying to be a gentleman I cannot stop the small annoying bubble of independence trying to claw its way out of my soul. Sorry that is just how I am. I am able to get out with a small struggle thanks to my ever so lucky oxygen tank and together we make our way inside. As soon as we enter the dwelling, I am hit by the scent of Italian herbs and dishes. I am already hungry so this was teasing me quite cruelly.

It does not take Dalton too long before he spot me. We are greeted by his ever charming self. He was kind man with slightly large stomach with big cheeks with a white goatee framing his mouth and chin. He wraps his long beefy arms around me in a large embrace. Wow three hugs in one day how lucky am I? I am just kidding as I love his hugs.

"My Hazel dear," he said in his heavy Italian accented voice.

"Good evening Dalton," I said as he looks over me with warm eye.

"I was just thinking of you today," He said as he held out an arm for us to follow him to a quiet corner in the restaurant to an empty booth in which I take a seat and Warner sit in the seat across from me. He nodded his thank to Dalton. He was being very quiet tonight.

"Thank you," Warner said as Dalton handed us each a menu. I knew the menu by heart so I already knew what I was going to have. Dalton smiled at us at he turned to go back into the kitchen. A young girl came over to our table with a pad and pencil ready to take our order.

"What can I get you guys to drink?" She asked.

"I will have water with lemon please," I answered and she turned to Warner her eyes turning quite appreciatively at the sight of him.

"I will have a merlot please," he said as she nodded before walking of o get our drinks.

There was a long silence between us one that had never been there before. It made nervous in a way. The girl returned to our table setting our glasses down on coasters and setting down a blow of lemon wedges beside my glass.

"I need a second," said Warner as he looked over the menu. The girl nodded before walking to another table that needed her attention.

"Is everything okay?" I asked concerned, as he had not said much to me on the drive here or right now. My mind raced to his mother. She was battling stage III breast cancer and she was very ill the last time I heard. I just hope everything was okay.

"I just have a lot of things on my mind tonight," He answered as our server returned to our table.

"Are you ready to order?" She asked.

"I will have the three mushroom ravioli with extra sauce please?" I asked and she turned to Warner and that look returned to her eyes.

"I will have the lemon sea bass penne," He said as he smiled at her. She blushed slightly before hurrying off to the kitchen. I scoffed at her quietly. I am used to this because he was handsome man and all girls drooled over him at first sight.

The silence returned to our table and it was very deafening so I busied myself by grabbing a few lemon wedges and squeezing them into my water glass.

"Is it because I made us late?" I asked as guilt settled down in the pit of my stomach.

Warner shook his head as he took a sip of his wine. He leaned forward as he let out a very long-winded sigh. I raised my eyebrows in alarm because I was completely lost for words. Never in the several months had I know has he acted this way.

"We need to talk," He said as he looked to be in deep thought. Before I could get a word out, our dinner arrived at our table steaming hot. My nose was awarded a wonderful aroma of oregano and basil. I grabbed my fork and took my first bite. The pasta melted on my tongue and I was in paradise. I could practically live off this food if I could.

"Continue," I said.

"Let's eat first," said Warner after he swallowed his bite.

"No," I said firmly putting my fork down. I am worried and my chest tightened from the stress of this worry.

"Just eat," He said and sat there stunned. He never spoke like this either. I picked up my fork and continued to eat but I was not dropping this matter.

"No," I repeated firmly. "I want to know what is going on right now."

"Alright," he said and what he said next was not what I expected.

"We need to break up," he said so quietly that I could barely hear him, but I did.

"Break up?" I asked. I dropped my fork as the words fully sank in to my brain. I could feel the prickle of tears building in my eyes, but I willed myself not to cry in front of him.

"Yes," He said not looking me in the eye.

"Why?" I asked. I was confused as I thought back of our history. Did I make him unhappy Was it because I had cancer and have a risk of it coming back? Maybe he can't handle having a sick girlfriend an mother. I thought everything was going good unless I read the wrong thing. Warner looked as if he did not want to answer me.

"Why?" I pressed again.

"I have been seeing someone else," He said and my jaw dropped completely open and I was thankful that it was not full of food.

"Someone else?" I said shocked. The feeling of betrayal hit me very hard and I almost could not control my tears. I could not believe it.

"Yes," He answered.

"Why-How?" I stuttered as I tried the grasp this all.

"It just happened and I feel so bad," He said as guilt showed in his eyes.

"How long?" I asked not looking at him.

"About three months," He answered.

"Wow," I said shaking my head and running a hand through my hair. I was thankful for my oxygen tank as I was nearly breathless from this shock and all I could think to say.

"I am going to Harvard in two week," I said.

"You can't go," He said his eyes wide. "I am going to Harvard."

"Excuse me?" I asked as more shock piled on to the shock I was already feeling.

"You can't go to Harvard. That is where we will be going and it would make everything just wrong," He said.

"I have worked my ass off for this!" I said. I could not believe that he would even ask me such a request. It made me just want to slap him, but I held myself back. He was out of his mind, there was no way I was giving up Harvard not after everything I went through to be here.

"Just go somewhere else," He said dismissively.

"Somewhere else?"I asked as I just started laughing as I could not believe how this night had completely turned upside down.

"First you break up with me after apparently cheating me for so long, then you have the nerve to ask me to give u my dream of going to Harvard?" I said my voice rising steadily with anger and I knew it had alerted Dalton because I can see him out of the corner of my eye.

"You need to leave," I said.

"What?" Warner asked as if he had not heard my words.

"I said to leave," I grounded out my voice was hoarse as my lungs started seizing up from the pressure of my emotions. I wanted to scream, yell, and hit him all at the same time. I have never felt this way in my entire life never have I felt like such a-a-a-fool.

"You cannot make me leave," He said smugly.

"She can't," said a voice. It was Dalton. I had forgotten about him being in the room. "I however, can."

"How are you going to get home?" Warner asked.

"Oh now you are concerned about my wellbeing?" I asked icily.

"I still care about you," Warner said and I did not believe him. "Let's go so I can take you home."

"I am not going anywhere with you," I said. "I'll manage."

"Let's go," said Dalton as he beckoned Warner out of his seat and then proceeded to escort him out of the restaurant.

Once Warner was out of my sight, I lowered my face in to my hand and the damn just crumbles as I sob out my heartbreak. My tears flow hotly down my cheeks in streams as sob after sob comes out. I feel someone sit down beside me and felt them wrap a warm arm around me. It was Dalton and I sobbed in to his shoulder.

"There there," He says softly as he held on to my head as I cried.

"He's been cheating on me,"I cried as I tried to understand what led him to do that.

"No true man would ever cheat on a woman of his affections. He is no man," Dalton said with years of wisdom in his voice.

"Then he asked me not to go to Harvard," I said. I did not know which was worse the cheating or asking me to give up my dream.

"Please do not listen to him," begged Dalton as he looked at me. "You deserve this."

"I am not giving up Harvard," I said firmly, but tears keep running down my cheeks.

"Good girl! You are way too talented to do so. Speaking of Harvard I have something for you," said Dalton a he reached in the pocket and producing a small yellow envelope. "I was planning on giving you this right before you left, but I thought now would be good time as ever."He explained.

I wiped away my tears before I took the envelope. It felt very thick and my breath caught in my throat as I opened it to find to small bundle of cash. I started at it with full disbelief before turning my eyes up at Dalton.

"I can not accept this," I said as I counted the several 100, fifty, and twenty dollar bills.

"I will be offended if you do not. This is just something we collected for you over the past year," Dalton said with pride in his eyes.

"Dalton," I said softly as new tears made their way down my face for a new reason. I was so touched by his generous offer.

"Can I pay for this wonderful meal with this?" I asked.

"I will not accept it. This meal is on the house," Dalton said. I shook my head with a big smile on my face. "You mother is here. I took the liberty of calling her for you."

My mother insisted that Dalton had her number in case of an emergency with my health. I am thankful that she did. She walked over to me and I got up, stirring my oxygen tank with me, meeting her in the middle of the room. Once I was in my mother's arms, the sob of tonight took me over. We stood there for several minutes with her rocking me as I cried. After sometime, I pulled myself together she took me home.

Later that night, I am lying in my bed watching TV. I curl up into myself as tears started falling again. I angrily wipe at my tears. I hate crying like this and I cannot stop. I never cried over boys. I must have been more attached to him than I thought. Maybe if he had broken up with me because of school I would have been okay, but the confession of his unfaithfulness is just eating me alive. I could never do that to someone even if they did it to me first.

I looked up at the Harvard pennant that was hanging us above my bed. Harvard was less than 10 days away and I could not wait. As I was thinking about Harvard words of a song begin filling my head. As always when an idea, I grabbed my song-book from my bedside table. I flip until I find a fresh page. I began humming a tune as I quickly write down the lyrics:

 _You stole my happy_

 _You made me cry_

 _You took the lonely_

 _and took me for a ride_

 _and I wanna un un un undo it_

 _You had my heart_

 _And now I want it back_

I stopped writing to look over what I wrote and I surprised myself. I smiled as I knew the pain of the break up will be with me for a while and it apparently gave me an edge on song writing. I had had worse pain than this almost to a 10 but I am saving my 10 for some reason. This pain was more of a five and I could live with this. I know I was going to be all right in time, but that did not make the pain any lesser. I place my song-book back in it's spot on my table and turned out my lamp so I could go to sleep slowly but surely to the comforting sound of my bipap machine.

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Please read and review please!

Alright here is chapter two.

Song choice: Undo it by Carrie Underwood.

You will me Agusutus soon as well as other people soon

Next chapter: Hazel arrives at Harvard.


	4. Chapter 3

Hey everyone! I hope you are enjoying this story. I have already have up to chapter six written, just have to type them out.

Are you ready? Here we go!

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Chapter Three

The next two weeks of my life went very slow and very fast at the same time. The day for leaving for Harvard was here and it is very hectic as we were bustling around to get the last odds and end. My mom and I spent the last week packing so that I would have everything that I would need. I am currently packing the last of my thinks in to a small suitcase and my mom was going over all of my medical equipment that I would be taking as well.

As I picked up a up a sweater to place in to the bag and something small fell out. I pick it up to find it being an old picture of Warner and I a couple of months ago. I don't even remember taking the picture, but determined not to let this break up ruin the day I quickly shove the picture in with the rest of the stuff. But I changed my mind by grabbing the offending piece and dropped into my trash can. I am not going to lie it has been hard on me and I really missed him. It was nice having someone else to talk too and not just about my medical issues. I finish with the bag zipping it up and pulling the strap over my shoulder to take to the car, but I was stopped by my dad.

"Hazel no," He scolded taking the bag from me before going down the stairs.

"I can manage," I sigh with a huff as I looked around my room making sure I was leaving nothing behind. I had to leave my lovely keyboard and sound board here which made me sad, but I am sure I will have access to the ones on campus which would be a lot bigger than what I am used to.

"That bag was really heavy," said Mom as she came into the room. "No heavy lifting remember?"

"How can I not with you two reminding me," I say sourly sitting down on my soft comfy bed.

"Just remember to take it easy," Mom said as she picked up a few small boxes before following my dad, who came back up for more stuff, to the car. My room was a lot less crammed other than the stuff that I could not take with me. There was one more thing I needed and then it would be time to go. I picked up my song book that was currently in its resting place on my table and my favorite writing pencil. Tip: Always write songs with a pencil never a pen.

"Are you ready?" asked Mom walking in scanning the room the same way I did a few moments ago.

"More than anything," I say, taking the handle of my tank as I walk out of my room down the stairs, slowly on my part, and to the car I went.

About twenty minutes in to the car ride, I nodded off in the back seat. This was my current a situation as I felt two hands on me shaking me awake. The perpetrator was my mother who was smiling at me knowingly. I would always fall asleep in the car, way before I ever got diagnosed with cancer. It did not matter how far we went car rides always made me sleepy. They would always tease me about missing out on road games with them.

"Hazel honey," She said softly. "We're here." I looked at her in shock. I must have fallen asleep a lot sooner because it did not feel like an hour. I felt as if I just closed my eyes, which was a little worrying to me, but I was not saying a word to my parents or they would literally pack me up in a box and take me home. Seriously!

"Really?" I whispered as I looked out my window and sure enough were I was staring at Harvard. It has been a long time since I have been here touring it with my parents making so many great plans. "Oh my God!"

I had to wait of course for my dad to find a parking space before I could get out. I am jumping out of my seat. After what like forever, I got out of our car and it fully hit me as I took in the beauty of the school that had been the apple in my eye since I was six. I turn around to pull my tank you and my mom quickly snapped a picture. I didn't even know she brought the camera.

"Really?" I ask laughing, but I know this was as big to them as it was to me.

"Yes really," Frannie smarted snapping a few more pictures. "Stand there next to the sign."

I rolled my eyes, but did as she asked and my dad joined me for a few of us together. I got out my paper work looking at what all I needed to do: Check in, find my dorm, then get my books.

"I have to check in," I read of my list my finger following the line.

"Let's go," Dad says as we walked over the threshold on to the campus. I wheeled my oxygen around some of the bricks of the pathway as the wheels got stuck a few times, but that did not stop me from taking in everything. The campus, thriving like a beehive, with students and family scattered across the grounds. I finally found the place I needed to be an area with a big banner: Freshman Registration. I could feel everyone's eye on me and I just wanted to shrink to the size of a dime. I found the table with the first letter of my last name.

"Name?" asked a guy in a monotone voice. He did not seem very thrilled to be here.

"Hazel Lancaster," I answered as I watch him flip through until he handed me the item I sought.

"Here you go," He said as he checked something on his "Alright now for you ID. Do not lose your ID it is you access to the library after hours and as well your meal card. It will also let you in to your dorm like a key would to your home." He explained picking up a camera and then looked at me awkwardly. "You'll have to take your thing out." He said pointing to his nose.

"I can't take it out," I protested quickly. Things would go downhill very fast if I did that. It does not take long for my body to go in distress once the oxygen leaves my body.

"It is college policy that nothing can obstruct the face in your photo ID," He said.

"But I need this on," I explained. "I can't be with out it and I am sure there are exceptions when it come the _Necessary_ medical requirements."

"Well then I do not know what to tell you." He said and I was beginning to get uncomfortable in his presence.

"Is there anyone else that can take the picture?" I asked tiredly as I was ready to get this over with. "I mean if you are afraid or something."

"I am not afraid," He argued.

"Then take her damn picture," said a voice from behind me. I turned to see a young girl, around my age, with glossy brown hair that went down to her waist, very straight teeth and a slightly British accent.

"The thing-" he began but the girl cut him off.

"If she says she can't take it out, she can't take it out," She said crossing her arms daring him to say another word.

"Fine," He sighed holding up the camera where I smiled at him. As he was preparing my ID I turned to the girl who had not left my side.

"Thank you," I said with a smile.

"Not a problem," She said smiling back at me as the guy handed me my lanyard.

"See was that so hard?" the girl asked sarcastically.

"No," He said not meeting her eyes.

"I didn't think so," She said ending the conversation as he attended another student who came up to the table

"What an asshole," She growled before turning her head back at me. "I'm Kaitlyn." She introduced holding out her hand.

"Hazel," I answered taking her hand. "I'm used to that anyway."

"Well you shouldn't have to be," She says as we walk towards my parents.

"Are you freshman?" I questioned curiously.

"I am," She said. "I am guessing you are since I met you over there. Do you know where your dorm is?"

I open up my packet looking for my housing assignment. It was the last page and I read" Hollis Hall" aloud.

"Really?" exclaimed Kaitlyn. "That is the same one as me. Shall we go and find them?"

"Alright," I nodded.

"Let's go," She says excitedly as she looped her arm with mine. I stopped walking when my eye landed on Warner, who was standing with a tall woman with short black hair and a sour looking face, thank fully he did not see me. I did not want this day go straight to crap as my heart twisted at little at the reminder of the break up. Kaitlyn looked back to see why I stopped walking so suddenly.

"Everything okay? Was I walking to fast?" She asked worriedly and followed my gaze. "Do you know them?"

"He's my ex,"I explained sourly.

"I see. Still not over him?" She wondered.

"Its only been two weeks ago," I commented and her eyes widen.

"No," She gasped. "And he is with her already?"

"Oh it was sooner than that more like while we were dating." I commended.

"Douche!" She whispered. "Beside you'll find better."

"Maybe, but I just want to relax and focus on my studies." I said. "Wait there are my parents." I pointed them out. Kaitlyn nodded in understanding.

"Mom," I called over the crowd. I see their gazes relax significantly as I must have left them in the sea of students.

"There you are sweetie," said Mom as she came to a stand beside me spotting Kaitlyn. "New friend?"

"This is Kaitlyn we are on our way to find our dorm," I explained.

"Roommates?" guessed Frannie as we walking along the path.

After a long walk, much longer due the fact that I had to sit down to catch my breath, we came among the dorm. The large red bricked building with two chimneys showing years of weather wear with several windows littering it. There are no steps on the entryway; which was great. However, on the inside were large staircases framing a door that led to a long hallway. It was beautiful decorative with many antique pictures and artwork.

"Look," said Kaitlyn pointing to the sign stating which level the numbers started. I looked at my paper, my dorm was on the lower level, and I was relieved that I would not have to catch my death on those stairs. They were excessively steep for me and I would never make it to the top. I follow the arrows walking through the hall that had a large notice board with various flyers of things such as study group notices, roommates need, or just selling things. Also there was as sign stating: Freshman Bash that was scheduled for later this evening. That sounded interesting but I did not know if I would go. Kaitlyn saw it too and looked at me questioning.

"Want to?" She asked questioning me with her eyes.

"I don't know," I said as I was feeling pretty tired from all the walking. I would probably would need the night to rest up.

I finally found my room; it was close to the back near another door that apparently led in from the parking lot. I open the door to find a rather nice size room it was completely bare except a bed with no sheets and a desk for me use. There was a window located at the head of the bed which allowed me to look across the campus grounds to the courtyard where a of social gatherings happened for the upperclassman I read.

"This is nice," my dad whistled. We lost Kaitlyn a few doors back as she found her own room.

"It is," I agreed sitting down on the bed. "Jealous?"

"Very," he quipped back enviously. "My own dorm at MIT was not this nice."

"You should have came here," I teased wholeheartedly and he rolled his eyes at me before telling my mom and me that he was running back for the car. My mom sat beside me.

"What do you think?" she asked.

"It is amazing," I say softly.

"It is," she agreed looking around. "Are you sure you are going to be fine here?"

"Yes mom," I tell her. I know she was just worried since this was the first time I was leaving home and my health, but I was ready for this.

"We can always move here into town," she suggested.

"And leave the house that you and Dad built from the ground up?" I asked in disbelief. "No! That is home."

"I'm just really worried is all. You have been really down since Warner broke up with you. I just don't want you to close back up." She said stroking my hair.

"I am not going to do that and oh well it his loss," I said. "I am not going to pine after him or anything and it gives me another edge on songwriting."

"That is true," she said. "Make sure you have your cell phone on you at all time." She reminded me.

"I always have it with me," I said pulling it out from my pocket and I pulled out the portable charger that I have with me. "It charged too."

"Good," She nodded looking around.

Over the next hour we brought my stuff in with the help of Kaitlyn which they gratefully accepted. I was not allowed to unload the car so I started unpacking my stuff finding places for it all. I was setting up my computer when my dad brought the last of it in.

"Boy you have a lot of stuff," he groaned after putting down a small bookcase.

"Sorry not sorry," I say as closed my laptop. I walked over to the box where my mom was pulling out my clothes putting them away.

"Mom stop," I said stilling her hands. "I can do this."

"I know," She said tearfully. I know this was hard on her and it was hard on me as well. "I'm going to miss you so much."

"Mom," I said resting my hands on her arms. "I am only an hour away. You can come and see me and I will call as much as possible."

"Yes. Make sure you come home for dinners on the weekend. You too Kaitlyn you are welcome to come," She said looking at the girl who nodded. Mom and Kaitlyn clicked like zippers on a coat. We all talked as we put everything away and soon my dorm was ready to live in. We all looked around at it proudly as it was drawing near the time my parents were going to leave. They had work in the morning and still had a long drive a head of them and rush hour traffic. We all looked at each other and Kaitlyn excused herself leaving the room and the three of us along. This was the moment they dreaded the most and wrapped their arms around me holding me close.

"I'll be okay," I told them as they looked over me tearfully. I don't know who was the worse but my dad's tears had competition with my mom's. My dad cried a lot. I mean you should have seen him at my high school graduation as I walked the stage. The tears were huge, but my heartfelt nothing but admiration for him as I was secretly a Daddy's girl.

"Just make sure you remember to see Dr. Hamburg for you results next week," My mom said. " I put in the reminder in the calendar on your phone too."

"Thank you mom," I said honestly. I don't know what I would do without her, but I was going to have to learn it. I am nervous about being by myself but I don't let them know that or they would never leave. I was ready for this sooo ready to be my own person.

"You are going to have to let me go at some point," I joke as they held me tighter.

"That will never happen," My mom said as my Dad nodded to her words.

"Oh this will give the chance to get a fake ID and to take pot," I joked.

"You don't "take pot'" my dad teases as he chuckled the sound rich.

"See I would know that if you allowed me to go to clubs when I was a teen," I said crossing my arms at them as they chuckled.

"Come one honey," My dad tells Mom placing a hand on her shoulders. "We have to leave."

"I'm not ready." Frannie sobbed in to her hands and my dad wrapped an arm around her to comfort her.

"I know. I'm not either." He said softly as tears clouded my eyes.

"I love you guys soo much. You are they best parents a girl could have," I say tearfully.

"We love you too." My mom says. "Oh and I will be up here in two weeks to change your oxygen tanks and to get them refilled."

"We'll make a day of it," I promised. We all walk together to the car. The least I could do was see them off after everything they have done for me.

"Bye sweetie," My mom says getting into their car. After many, more tears and exchanges, they pull out and drive away leaving me alone.

"Are you okay?" asked Kaitlyn as she appeared beside me.

"Yeah," I answered wiping away the last of my tears. "Where did you go?"

"It looked like a private family moment," She murmured.

"Are you kidding? My mom practically adopted you after a few hours," I laughed. We walked back to my dorm where we sat talking.

"So why do you need the tank?" She asked.

"I have scared lung from a complication from chemo," I explained.

"Chemo?" She said her eyes wide. "You have cancer?"

"Yes and no. I am in remission right now." I tell her.

"Remission so that is good right?"She asked.

"Yes remission is great. It has been over a year since my last relapse." I said.

"Do you worry that it will come back?" She asked.

"It's always on my mind," I confessed honestly. "But it's no way to live your life."

"We'll I am glad you are okay," says Kaitlyn softly and I smile at her.

"Me too," I finished.

"So this Freshman Bash. Are you going? Because it is kind of required for us to go," She commented,

"Well if I'm required to go then I guess I am, but I want to get my books first before we go." I said getting up.

"We'll then I will meet you in two hours and we'll go together alright?" She asked. As she opened the door, there was a boy standing outside apparently about to knock on the door. He was tall with blonde hair, thick glasses, and an earring in his one ear.

"Is this the room of Hazel Lancaster?" he asked nervously scanning the both of us.

"That would be me," I say raising my hand.

"Great. I am here to bring you a message from Dr. Marshall," he explains.

"Ah Dr. Marshall," I say knowingly. "What is the message?"

He looks down at the note squinting at the writing. "He says to come to his office after you are settled in."

"Thank you," I said not knowing what to call him. "Your name?"

"Isaac Tanner," he answered.

"Thank you Isaac," I said smiling. "I'll see you later?" I asked Kaitlyn who nodded before leaving to go to her own dorm.

"I don't remember where his office is. Can you show me?" I asked and he nodded.

"Yeah. It's a few buildings down from here can you walk there?" he asked eyeing my tank.

"Yeah I can walk," I nodded pulling my tank out behind me before closing my door. "Lead the way."

As we walked I noticed more of the campus and it reignites the excitement in me.

He notices the look and asks. "It's great isn't it?"

"It is incredible," I say noticing the library as we walked passed it. "Have you been here long?"

"I am a freshman as well, but I was here for the summer music program for producers," He explained.

"Wow," I said impressed. I knew of the programs but was unable to attend due to just getting off of chemo two mother earlier. I just didn't have strength to attend.

"My brother is here too," Isaac added.

"What does he do?" I asked.

"He is here on a basketball scholarship," He answered.

"Do you play as well?" I asked curiously. I was enjoying this conversation with him.

"I the game and I play for fun, but nothing like that. I can't play really," he said sadly.

"Why not?" I asked.

"I'm half blind," he answered.

"You are not," I gape.

"I got cancer in my eye when I was younger and had to lose it," He explained pointing to his one eye. "This is glass."

"I know first hand on how cancer sucks. It basically stolen everything from me. I love to sing, but I can't because the oxygen," I said sadly nodding to my tank.

"You're a cancer survivor too?" He asked.

"I am." I said.

"What kind?" he asked.

"Leukemia," I answered.

"Ah," He said as he opened a door to a building. I remembered where I was now. Its just been several years since I had been to Dr. Wallace's office. Like my dorm building, this too was decorated with old art and you could see the age in the flooring.

"Here we are," Isaac says knocking on an opened door.

"Come in," a male said looking up from his desk who greeted me with a warm smiled.

"I brought Hazel like you asked," he informed.

"Thank you Isaac. I am glad you got to meet her because you better get used to seeing her face," he praises as a blush cloaked my cheeks. He always did praise me to the highest he ever could.

"Hello Dr. Marshall," I said holding out me hand.

"You are going to greet me like that?" He joked. "Isaac I want you to meet the best song writer of our time."

"I would not say the best," I say laughing at the praise. I was good at it, but definitely not the best. I still had a lot to learn.

"So modest," He teased. "Isaac here will help you produce anything that comes to your precious mind."

"A producer. You are a music major too?" I asked.

"I am," He said happily. "But I have got to go for now. Will I see you ate the bash?"

"Yeah I will be there," I concluded.

"Great see you then," He smiled as he made his exit.

"That was the light of my night seeing my best two students together. Have a seat," Dr. Marshall said pointing to a chair in front of his desk. I gladly took it, as I needed to sit down and settled my tank beside me careful not to get my cannula tangled with the chair. I could walk fine as I was always moving, but standing took my breath away.

"I am guessing you are wondering why I summoned you?" He asked.

"A bit," I confessed. "Not that I'm not happy to see you. It's been too long."

"It has and how are you?" requested Dr. Marshall.

"Very well," I tell him looking around his office. I noticed a music sheet framed and smiled. "You still have that?"

"Of course," He said getting out of his chair to go to the frame. "So Small was one of your best songs. Now back to why you are here."

He sat back down and pulled out a drawer rummaging through it before producing a key handing it to me. I took it looking at him questioningly.

"What is this?" I asked.

"That there is your personal key to the sound room," he explained as it dawned on me.

"Are you serious?" I breathed out as if I was holding ten pounds of gold in my hand.

"Dead serious," Dr. Marshall vowed.

"Oh my God," I whispered as my heart pounded in my chest.

"Why you are here I want you to be able to have full access to whatever is you need." He continued. "Have Isaac help you as well."

"Oh my God," I repeated looking at him. "Thank you so much!" I was so thankful that I was on oxygen at the moment because I would have passed out from the emotions cruising throughout my body. This was so surreal.

"You are very welcome. You better get going you have a bash to attend to." He laughed as I was too stunned to speak other than to nod at him

"Hazel," He called as I turned to leave.

"Yes?" I answered. I hope he did not have any more surprises because I would so faint at the point.

"Welcome to Harvard." congratulated Dr. Marshall.

I left his office not sure if I was really living this dream. All I could think about was how awesome these next four years were going to be and I couldn't wait to see what was next.

* * *

Wow that was a lot of words. This chapter is very long I hope you forgive me for it. I hope you enjoy it.

You got to meet Kaitlyn and Isaac, but what about Augustus. You will be seeing him very soon.

I have some much fire for this story that I already have the next several chapters written its just taking me longer to post them because I have to work.

Well anyway. I am going to go. Please read and Review.

I love you guys and see you soon.


	5. Chapter 4

Here is chapter four and I apologize for the length…not really. I have so much already written I can't wait to show you. I am on vacation from work so maybe more chapters will be type. Here we go! Please enjoy!

I think you will like this chapter a lot.

* * *

Chapter Four

I left Dr. Marshall's office in a daze on cloud nine. I could not believe what had just happened. I held the key up looking at it as if it was the last golden ticket to the chocolate factory. I pressed the thick shiny metal to me lips as it if were my prized possession and at this very moment it was. Now all I have to do is get a lanyard or something to keep around my neck so I could have it with me at all times or to make sure it doesn't get in the wrong hands even in my showers. I glanced at my watch I an hour and half before I had to be back at the dorm to meet Kaitlyn giving me some time to get my books.

So I turn around, dragging my tank with me, to go to the book stores. When I enter my hopes of being in and out of the bookstore vanished. It was packed to the brim with students in line with an overwhelm cashier who was working as fast as she could with so many people shouting demands at her. I did not have my list with me, but I could remember the ones I needed as I have read over my booklist several times so I grab me a little hand basket and make my way through the crowd with my tank in tow.

Most of the people parted way for me and some I had to push through. I finally made it to where the books were located and this area was not as crowded as it was there were more space. I wind through rows after rows of book cases until I found one of mine and grabbed it, this one was for psychology, before moving on to find my other two books as I am only taking three courses because my parents asking me not to overwork myself. I moved to find my next subject: Biology which was easy to get to which left my last final subject: Music Fundamentals, which is for my major.

The music section was in a corner away from the other books and after a small search I finally found the section, I needed. I scanned all the different titles until I spotted the book I needed. As I laid a hand down on it to claim it as mind another hand unexpectedly slammed down on the book as well making me jump out of my skin. I lift my eyes to see a pair of the bluest eyes I have ever seen and I felt the breath leave my damaged lungs. They belong to a boy who was also staring back at me. His brown hair darkened by a damping sweat that clung to his forehead.

"I need this book," I say, however, the moment was completely erased when he opened his mouth.

"So I saw it first," He spoke harshly. "Just get another book." His tone was void of any emotion.

"Well I am sorry," I said pulling on it clenching my fist around the binding determined not to let him win.

"No, I want this book," He sighed clearly impatient, but I was standing my ground.

"Well I need this book which is much more serious than a want," I toss back just as hotly.

"I don't have time for this," He said running a hand through his wet hair and I look at him with a look of disgust.

"That is not my problem," I snap pulling on the book. "Just let me have it as I was here and we can be on our way."

"Why because you are sick?" He snapped tossing his eyes down at my tank. When his eyes returned to mine, they were full of shock and regret. I turn my face away from him as the words stabbed me like a knife. Taking a large breath, I turn around to confront him and he was gone. I looked around the place and he was nowhere insight as if he was just as if he was just a piece of my imagination. The pain was still running through my veins as I grabbed the book tossing it in to my basket before taking the handle of my tank, which made me think of his words as if there were on constant repeat in my mind. As I made my way to the very long line as I was constantly blinking back tears.

Later after a very long wait in line, I was sitting on my bed in my dorm looking though my music book waiting for Kate to return from getting ready. I was not really in the mood to go to this Bash. I kept thinking about the boy in the bookstore and close my book in frustration. I keep telling myself to forget it but I can't. His words hurt me deeply and I did not even know him, but I guess that is how wrong the real world can be outside of my house.

"Hazel?" called Kaitlyn entering my room bringing me back to the present.

"Hmm?" I answer absently.

"Are you okay?" She inquired sitting down on my bed eyeing my concerned.

"I'm fine," I lied then she held up two lipsticks.

"Which one?" She asked. "I can't choose." There was a bright pink shade and a pale nude shaded.

"The pink one," I point out. "It goes best with your nails and what you are wearing."

"This is for you," states Kaitlyn.

"For me?" I asked slightly worried. I almost never wear makeup. I never felt worthy of it to feel beautiful because truthfully I am the exact opposite of everything beauty stands for. "I don't wear makeup."

"Why not?" gasped Kate as if she never heard such a thing.

"I never felt the need to where it I guess," I replied quietly.

"Trust me honey, you have all the equipment," she gushes, her eyes sweeping my curled up form.

"Stop it," I admonished blushing from her comment.

"I only speak the truth," pressed Kaitlyn as she continued to look at me. "Are you sure you are okay?"

"Yeah why?" I asked confused,

"The light in your eyes is gone," She noted her eyes worried.

"I'm just a little tired from this day. It was a lot for me." I said which was mostly true as I picked up my phone, which was charging on the bed. "It is time to go."

"Well let's go. I will drive us there since it is at the far corner of the campus," she said standing up pulling her car keys from her pocket. I get up checking my tank to make sure it was good on my levels and as I walk out the door, I feel myself starting to become very nervous.

I follow Kate out the back for to her car which is a dark blue mustang with a large white stripe in the middle. It goes well with her fiery personality as I have come to learn in earlier in the day. She got in leaning over to unlock the passenger door so I could get in. I put my tank in first before I lower myself in to a dark purple leather seats.

"This is very nice," I said looking over her car.

"This old thing?" She questions looking around it fondly. "I have had this car for years and I love it." Kaitlyn finished proudly.

The drive to the party was fairly short around 10 minutes due to traffic. I slowly got of the car as gracefully as I could so I would not make a fool of myself as a first impression. The party was in full swing. There was strew of tables where students at laughing and talking, table with various foods for eating and various drinks for drinking. The was a larger table with music equipment which was being handle by Isaac and he spots me and waves as he changes the ending song to the next. I return the wave smiling weakly as the whole setting was a little overwhelming for me.

"What do you think?" asks Kaitlyn who completely at ease.

"This is incredible," I answered in awe as I have never been to something like this. I was never allowed out to clubs because of my blood counts due the possible risk of getting a cold or an infection, which would have killed me faster than the cancer.

"Well lets mingle," She says pulling me with her almost tripping me due to my tank.

"Woah," I yelped.

"Sorry," She rushed her face was panicked.

"It is okay," I tell her laughing at her face. "It's fine honest."

We walked forward much slower this time as we made our to an empty table that was closer to the music table making the music much more louder than I was used to. Kaitlyn got up walking over to someone she apparently knew leaving me alone in my own defenses.

"Hazel?" a voice jerking my attention and it made me jump. I turn to see that the voice belong to Warner who was standing there holding the hands of his girl friend.

"Don't sneak up on me," I scolded standing up.

"Hazel what are you doing here?" asked Warner. He acted so surprised that I was here.

"You know I got in to Harvard," I answered shortly. The girl who was standing next to him was glaring harshly at me as if I had broken her happy bliss.

"I told you not to come here," He sighed. "To go to another school."

"I'm sorry but your reasons were not good enough to give this up," I tossed back.

"Yet you are still here," He snapped.

"I am still here," I answered smugly. "Sorry not sorry."

"You did this out of spite," He accused and I had to stop myself from bursting into laughter with tears.

"Out of spite?" I say and I could not contain my laughter any longer.

"You don't belong here," spoke the short black headed girl. I never did catch her name, but I narrowed my eyes at her.

"Let me set the record straight," I started heatedly. "I have had a spot here at Harvard since I was 17 years old. I came here for me and only me. After you broke up with me two weeks ago, I haven't given you a second thought in fact it empowers me to be honest. The only reason you don't want me here is because you didn't want to show that you cheated me or face your guilt for it." I finish and I know my words straight at home in his heart.

"That's not it," mutters Warner quietly crossing his arms.

"That is the truth and you know it. You better get used to seeing me around campus, because I am not going anywhere. I am here because it's been my dream to come here and I am not giving it up for your selfish reason or anyone else." I snap and seeing that he was not going to win this battle now him and girl stroll of in to the crowd. Shaking my head in anger in hopes to clear it, I take a hold of the handle on my tank so I could get out of here. As I turn to leave I find myself colliding into someone. The force of it sends me backwards, but not before I feel hands snake around me to prevent me from falling to the ground.

"Sorry," I muttered embarrassingly as I tried to regain my breaths as this whole incident had a bad impact on my sucky lungs.

"My bad," answers a deep rich voice. I open my eyes to see the rich blue eyes from earlier today pouring searching in to mine.

"You," I snap yanking myself away from his hands feeling dread come over me. As if I had not had enough shit dealt my way tonight.

"You," He repeated his eyes never leaving mine.

"I'm sorry," I repeated as I pulled away to walk around him since he was not moving on his own and then I felt his grab my hand for some reason his touch was already engrained in my memory.

"Yes?" I question turning around to face him.

"I was hoping that I would run in to you," He spoke shyly as if he was nervous.

"Why?" I asked pulling my hand away crossing my arms. I didn't want to drop my guard even though those blue eyes of his were making it really hard not too as if I could trust him. Then I remember his words.

"I want to apologize for how I spoke you this afternoon," He said dropping those blue eyes from mine. "I was having a really crappy day."

"You were an ass," I tell him.

"I was and it was not fair of me to take it out on you," He said returning those eyes back to mine. I was starting to respect the whole conversion of eye contact because I was really enjoying it now.

"It was not fair," I agreed nodding. "Well?"

"I am so sorry," He said earnestly and I took in his whole handsome face. He was so stinking serious that he took my breath away and wondered if I could play it out on him for a little while.

"Yeah well," I said putting my hands over my face as I pretended to fake sob. "It was really awful and mean." I sobbed as I looked through my fingers and his face was in panic mode.

"I am really sorry," He said. "Please don't cry."

"No," I said shaking with laughter, but to him it was of despair.

"I," He looked around running his hair through this thick brown hair. I shook my head before I lowered my hand to show my laughter.

"What?" He asked shocked as it dawned to him what has just happened.

"It's fine," I said snickering.

"You-" He gaped as it turned into a smirk. "You faker!"

"I'm sorry," I said laughing harder. "It was so worth it."

"That was mean," He breathed letting out a big sigh in relief.

"Well were even now," I said laughing at him still.

"What was that about?" he asked,

"What was what?" I asked confused.

"You looked upset earlier after talking with that guy," He noted.

"Oh that was just ex-boyfriend drama," I answered.

"Ah," He nodded as if he totally understood as I turn back to leave. "Where you going?"

"I am not really feeling this party," I sighed. "It has never been my scene."

"It just got started," He protested before he walked in front of me blocking my way preventing me from leaving.

"I don't know how to party," I confess.

"Everyone can party," He acknowledged . "They just do it in different ways. Some drink, some dance, some make, some do just about everything."

"I never thought of it that way," I nodded but that did not squash the feeling of being out of place. I was awarded a bright smile from him that only brighten his blue eyes. He was absolutely stunning.

"You can thank me later," He joked.

"Later?" I chuckle. "What makes you think that I will be talking to you later?" I challenged.

"Everyone talks to me," He answers cockily making me shake my head.

Suddenly I felt the energy leave my body and I needed to sit down as my lungs begin to ache.

"Do you mind if I sat down?" I asked weakly from standing too long.

"No not at all," he said pointing to the table, I had previously been sitting at.

"Sorry," I muttered sitting down hunching over as I tried to catch my elbows on my knees.

"Do not apologize," He says simply."Seriously are you okay?"

"Yeah, I just stood way too long," I explained breathlessly trying to gain some control.

"What's your name?" He asks.

"Hazel," I say.

"No what's you full name?" He pushes and I look at him.

"Hazel Grace Lancaster," I say. "Yours?"

"That would be Augustus Waters," He replied. "Or just Gus that's what most people call me."

"It is very nice to meet you Augustus Waters," I say.

"Likewise Hazel Grace," He smiles lightly and something tears his eyes away from me. "Ugh!" he cries flinching.

"What's wrong?" I asked ay his sudden outcry.

"That!" He says pointing to a couple over by the music table who were making out as if they were the only ones in the world. It was Isaac and a very long blond head girl. "That is my brother and his girlfriend." He explains with embarrassment grimacing his face.

"You don't like her?"I guessed picking up on the vibe."

"More of a hatred for her. All she does is cheat on her," Gus confides in to me.

"Why? Isaac seems so nice," I comment. "Wait your Isaac's brother?" I asked connecting the dots.

"Yeah," He answers looking at me confused.

"So you're here on a basketball scholarship," I tell him.

"Yeah. How do you know?" He asked still confused.

"Isaac told me earlier today," I say.

"How do you know Isaac?" He questioned.

"I talked to him briefly as we have the same major," I tell him.

"Ahh," Gus say knowingly. "A music girl that explains big aura sophisticated." He teased.

"Always."

"Always."

"Always."

"Always."

"What's with the always?" I ask Gus.

"Always is like their thing," He said the grimace is back in his face. "Like the will _Always_ love each other and what not. They probably have texted it to each other about four million times this year." I giggle at the sight of his face, as it was just simply adorable.

I glanced down at my watch and surprised to see how much time has passed since striking up the very fun conversation with Augustus Waters. I even forgot that we were at party and I glance around trying to spot Kaitlyn who I do not see anywhere. I hope she did not leave me behind. It funny how fast time flies by when you are not even aware of it. I lift my tubing of my cannula to check my tank levels it was getting near to where it had to be changed and the walk back was going to be long.

"I should be going," I say softly to him he was also watching the party leaving us in a comfortable silence until I spoke just now.

"How are you getting back?" asks Augustus.

"I guess I will be walking as I don't see my ride anywhere." I grumble as I scan the crowd again. This freshman class of 2017 was a particularly huge one. I did not see her anywhere.

"Let me take you back," He suggested.

"You could be an ax murderer," I toss back.

"There's always that possibility!" chuckles Augustus as he reached into his pocket pulling out a pack of cigarettes before opening the pack, pulling one out, and putting it to his lips.

"Really!" I exclaimed shocked. It really pisses me off when I see people doing this nasty habit. "That is disgusting!"

"What?" he says looking down at the pack in his hand before pulling the stick from his mouth.

"Do you think that is cool or something?" I rant at him as he looks at me confused. "You just ruined this whole thing."

"What whole things?" He asked as if he missed something.

"Nothing," I snapped. "God there is always a hamartia isn't there?"

"Hazel Grace," Gus starts but I don't let him finish.

"The thing is even though you never had freaking cancer that you are willing to money to a corporation so you could possibly develop a higher risk of getting cancer?" I spit out. "Let me tell you that not being able to breathe sucks! It totally sucks!" I finished my rant slightly breathless.

"Hamartia?" asks Augustus with smile.

"It's a fatal flaw," I inform him.

"Ah fatal…" He mutters. "Hazel Grace they don't actually hurt you unless you light them." He says.

"Hmm?" I say dumbly not sure how to respond to that.

"I never lit one. It's a metaphor, see: You put thing that does the killing right between your teeth, but you never give it the power to do its killing. A metaphor." He finishes with a smile his blue eyes sparkling with life.

I was utterly speechless as I was not expecting such a response. "Wow," was all I could say or think and he smirked knowingly.

"C'mon, I'll drive you back to your dorm," He said standing up. "Where is your dorm?"

"Hollis Hall," I answered.

"That's only three buildings away from dorm," He said happily as he led me to a silver jeep in which he opened the passenger side door for me. Normally I would be irritated about it but with him I found it endearing. A few moments later we were sitting in the parking lot out side my building when he turned to me.

"Hazel Grace," He says.

"Yes?" I answered shyly.

"It was a pleasure to make your acquaintance," He said the sound of his voice makes my heart purr lightly.

"It was," I say nodded before opening the door.

"Can I see you tomorrow?" He asked hopefulness in his voice.

"Easy there grasshopper," I chuckled as I pulled myself and tank from the seat.

"Let me see your phone," He prodded and I don't know why but I handed it to him. After a second he gave it back to me.

"Your number?" I say raising an eyebrow at him.

"Just in case if you change your mind or need anything," offers Augustus, blazing me with another dazzling smile that made my stomach clench.

"Thanks, but I am a big girl," I toss back at him.

"See you around?" He asked.

"Okay," I said.

"Okay," he repeats as I closed the door and watch him drive off. As I reached my door I found myself feeling breathless and not because I from being sick or having sucky lungs. But because of a certain blue eyed boy who I just met and this breathless feeling was not so bad.

* * *

Okay okay

Hazel and Gus finally meet!

Here is Chapter 4! I hope you like the little fluffiness of the chapters!

I hope you stay tune for the plans I have for these two in the upcoming chapters. Be prepared this fanfic can be getting long. I already have up to chapter 11 written and I am not even close to finishing the fic there!

Until next which will be soon since I am on vacation this week! See you soon!


	6. Chapter 5

Hey everyone! I want to take a little time and thank everyone for reading! I just can't stop writing this story. There are some days where I barely getting nothing on paper and days where I write and write and write. Of course I have my family and job that come first. But this story has allowed me to stretch to new levels of writing and strengthen my confidence as a writer! I have been writing since I was 14 and I will be turning 28 in December and I often look back and I am proud to see how far I have come.

This chapter is a little bit on the shorter side of my previous ones, but I hope you enjoy it just the same!

Lets get started!

* * *

Chapter Five

The weekend flew by so quickly that I didn't have time to watch it pass and soon it was Monday the first day of classes. I got up super early to get ready for to make sure I would not over sleep since my first class started at 8 am. I made my way to Annenberg Hall to eat a little something before I made my way over to music hall where my first class is located.

I taking a gasping breath as I took in the hall before me. The room with filled with a beautiful redwood finish that made it seem to glow or maybe that was the stain filled glass that line the top of the walls near the artistically arched ceiling. There were many rows of tables with low hanging chandeliers hanging low to give students extra light as they devoured their meals. It was like my very own personal Great Hall of Hogwarts. I felt giddy as I walked in to the hall that was already buzzing full of students talking and laughing. Some of them were in panic modes of starting classes with fear of not excelling. I walk up, dragging my tank behind me, to the guy handing him my meal card before walking past him to the food line. The line moved quickly and I chose a simple fruit salad as my main course as I was not very hungry and of course, my ever needy cup of coffee.

I walk around the room with carefully holding on to my tray as well as my tank until I came to a spot that was not overloaded with the other students. I could hear my mom even though she was miles away saying that I need to mingle more, but it is simply not that easy. Most of the time if I ever get near people I am sent away by the pity in their eyes or the feeling of sticking out like a green thumb. So most of the time I stick to myself because it is just easier. However, it was not long after I begin to eat Kaitlyn appears in front of me sitting down across from me.

"Good Morning," She smiles as she splits her blueberry bagel in half to spread on some cream cheese. "I couldn't find you last night. Where did you go?"

"I went back after I ran into Warner and his girlfriend," I say swallowing a piece of honeydew.

"I bet that was a downer," she sighs taking a bite of her food. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah, I'm fine," I smile as the night was not a complete waste.

"What class do you have this morning?" Kaitlyn looks to me.

"Music Fundamentals I," I say. "It a course for my major."

"Which is?" She asks as she takes a sip of grapefruit juice.

"Music Major," I reminded her.

"Oh yeah," She face palms herself and I laugh at her jester.

"Which starts in fifteen minutes," I say glancing at my watch and I spooned the bite of fruit to my mouth.

"Okay. I will see you later?" She looks to me.

"Yeah," I nod as I stand up pulling my bag on to my shoulder, gathering my trashing, then taking hold of my tank handle before steering it behind me as I got rid of my tray. Then I made my way out of the hall in to the fresh air. The day was already beautiful along with that wonderful fresh morning smell that I love so much. I pull out the class map that was prepared for the students to follow so that they would not get lost of the huge campus and make it to class on time.

Thankfully I was able to find the building without any problems other than my aching lungs. I would be fine once I was able to sit down and catch my breath. I pause to pick up my tank as I walked up a small staircase entering the building to go find my classroom. It was on the left, which opened up to a small classroom that had seats like an auditorium that already had a few students sitting in them. Looking around to find the best seat for me, I spot Isaac noticing a few open seats beside him so I walk over to him.

"Hey," I smile. "Do you mind if I have a seat?"

"Of course not Hazel," Isaac grins before lifting up his bag from the chair so I could sit down. "It is nice to know some else in the class."

"I know," I sigh as I sit down. "This is going to be great."

"It is," He agrees as I play around with my tank to get it out of other people's way before leaning down to get out my class materials.

"Dude, I thought I ask you to save me a seat?" sounds a voice that apparently was permanently etched in to my brain. I sit up and sure enough, it was Augustus Waters.

"I asked if I could sit here," I look at him while defending Isaac hoping he would not be mad at him.

"Hello there Hazel Grace," Gus grins back at me before taking the seat next to me.

"You two have met?" Isaac looked to us confused.

"At the bash," I tell him.

"That was the light of my night," Gus teases as I roll my eyes at him.

"I see," Isaac smirks at Gus. "I came by your room to get you, but you were gone."

"I had an early morning practice," Gus apologized. "I got the text at 5 am this morning. Coach is really pushing for this win on Friday."

As the boys talked amongst I notice Warner and Vivian walking in to the class and I let out a silent groan or so I thought.

"Hazel Grace?" Gus looks at me concerned as did Isaac.

"Huh?" I look at him. "Sorry," I blushed.

"What's wrong?" wonders Gus as they both follow my gaze.

"Please tell me I am seeing things Warner," groaned Viv as her eyes zoned in on me making me look down to my lap. "I think you are in the wrong class."She sneers at me, but Gus was not having it.

"You guys can keep on going," He say his voice firmly set as he looked to Warner then to Vivian. "Your presence is not needed here."

"By the way, if anyone is in the wrong class," Isaac looks to them. "It's not her." I smile at the two as they sauntered off to find their seats.

"Thank you two," I say incredibly touched by the way they stood up for me and they don't even know me.

"No problem," Gus sighs. "I hate people like that."

"How do you know I belong in this class?" I turn to Isaac.

"Marshall told me a little bit about you before I came to get you the other day," He answers.

"Oh," I blush as I know how Dr. Marshall can be.

"So you are in this class?" I ask Gus turning my eyes back to him.

"Yep," Gus nods. "I needed an elective and this was one of the remaining two with opening. It was either this class or a Drama class."

"Ow," I cringe.

"I hope I made the right choice, because I suck at drama." He shakes his head his blue eyes gleaming.

"You never know until you try," I say.

"Oh he knows," Isaac says making Gus glare at him. "Ask him about his 5th grade play."

"You just broke the unspoken brother code." He tosses at Isaac who just shrugs innocently making giggle. I sensed that these two were very close as most twin siblings do and it almost makes me wish that I had a sibling of my own.

"Good morning everyone," says Dr. Marshall as he enters the room. He shoots me a smile as he made his way to the front. "I hope you are awake this morning, because there is a lot to do today."

"I am Dr. Will Marshall," He introduces himself. "And I will try my very best to teach you about music." He looks around the room as apprehension fills his student's faces. "I'm kidding will teach you about Music as this class is called Music Fundamentals." He places a bag on his desk before opening it pulling out a stack of papers before walking around to hand them out.

"To those who think that this will be an easy A, I have news for you. It not be as there are many things we will be doing that require to test your creativity." He says looking around the room. "There will be many challenges such as songwriting. Song writing is not an easy task as it can be very difficult. I hope you will be prepared. You will have partner throughout this whole term so it will require team work and you guys actually turning in your assignments." Once he was finished with the papers he walked back to his desk and sat down on top of it. "The paper you just received is you syllabus for the term. Do not lose it, if you do borrow it or come to me for another one.

Now as I said songwriting will take place in this class. There will be challenges throughout the terms. You and your partner will be required to write a song on a topic of my choosing. You will turn in these songs in hopes to have one chosen for the Songwriters Showcase at the end of the term. So good luck to all." He smiles before glancing around the room. "Are you ready to meet you partners?" Marshall then proceeds to pair up people before turning to the three of us. "You two," He points to Gus and I.

I look over to Gus who was already smiling at me and I shook my head. "You better not fail me."

"I would never do such a thing," Gus says with a hand on his chest. "Besides I have to maintain a 3.0 GPA in order to stay on the basketball team as well as to keep my scholarship."

"Good," I nodded as I am convinced that this will work because well A: I am the best songwriter in the class and B: What I just said.

"So what is your specialty?" asks Gus.

"That would be songwriting," I answer with a smirk.

"Really?" Gus looks surprised.

"It's my one true love," I say proudly.

"Are you any good?" he asks.

"I won a scholarship because of it," I confess to him.

"Well that says a lot," He says. "Can I see some songs?"

"The only songs you will be seeing is the ones we write," I tell him as I have never shown anyone my songs other than to win the scholarship and my parents. "Maybe one day I will show you my pervious works."

"Hazel Grace," He begins. "This looks to be the start of a great thing." Gus shooting me one of his amazing smiles.

"I could not agree more," I nodded.

"So are you coming to the game this Friday?" Gus wonders.

"I don't know," I shrug at him.

"When was the last time you have been to basketball game?" He asks.

"Umm," I say slowly this has him raising his eyebrows.

"Hazel Grace," Gus begins slowly. "When was the last time you have been to a basketball game?"

"When they come on the TV in my living room," I sighed.

"You have never been to a basketball game?" He says incredulously.

"No I have never been," I shake my head.

"You are serious?" He sighs.

"As I can be," I tell him.

"Well that settles it," Gus shakes his head. "You are coming to this game."

"What if I don't want to go?" I challenge him.

"Then I will find out where your dorm is….Oh wait!" He smirks. "I already know." I roll my eyes at him.

"Anyway I will come to your dorm and I will throw you over my shoulder," He says laughing as I try to picture the image.

"Even my oxygen tank?" I asked smartly.

"Even the oxygen tank," He confirms.

I shake my head at him as I have never met another person who was as stubborn as me. Who would challenge me like this, but I liked it. And the way he was looking at me, made me almost melt into my chuck taylors.

"I don't have a choice do I?" I sighed with a smile still on my face.

"No, not even a little," Gus finishes satisfied with my answer. I could not explain what I was feeling but I was completely breathless and this time it was not from the lack of oxygen in my lungs. This simple young man unexpectedly made an impact in my life in just two short days.

"Now that you are all paired for the term; it is time for you to receive your first song topic," Marshall said pulling out a jar in desk before shaking up the small pieces of paper inside them before pulling one out. "Winning," He reads as he places it down on his desk before continuing with his lecture that made me unable to speak to Gus until the end of class.

"So do you want to get started?" asks Gus as we packed up our things. Isaac had already left because he had another class to be in and I needed to get going because I had a doctor's appointment to get too.

"I wish I could, but I have so be somewhere in about 46 minutes," I sigh regretfully. I would love to just shrug of the appointment to go writing with Gus, but I could not miss any what so ever. "Maybe tonight after I get back?"

"I have another practice," He sighs as we walked out of the classroom together.

"We'll figure it out. We have a couple of weeks before it due so we have time," I assured him as we walk down the steps outside.

"Alright," He nods.

"Just let me know when you want to meet up," I said I break away to head toward the metro station. "Okay?"

"Okay," Gus smiles before turning to walk off and I glance down at my watch because the metro ride itself was about 15 minutes so I hurry as fast as my lungs allow.

After 4 trains stops one was because I got off at the wrong place, I finally make it to my destination. Today was the day I find out my results of my lab work from a couple of weeks ago. Normally I hear about them the next day, but this time I have not heard a word and honestly I did not like that as I am really nervous as I sit in the office waiting for my new doctor to make an appearance.

I sit in the cold room staring out the window allowed me to see the landscape of downtown Boston. I wondered what it looked like when it was dark and the city was lit up.

"Miss Lancaster?" asks a very dark skinned woman as she made her way around to her desk.

"Yes that is me," I smile even though my insides were trembling.

"How are you? I am sorry to keep you waiting. I am Doctor Hamburg and I will be taking over you case from now on," She greets.

"Awesome, but I have not heard anything about my pervious lad work," I informed her.

"That was my call as I received your results as soon as they came back. I rather talk to my patients in person rather than on the phone," She explains as she opens up my file. "Next time you won't have to wait so long."

"Wonderful," I smiles. "So?"

"You levels were great," She says looking over the paper.

"Really?" I cried as the weight in my chest lifted.

"Yes sweetie, you are still in remission." Dr. Hamburg smiles as me. "In fact your levels with you levels being this great I am going to have you come in monthly for your blood tests instead of every two weeks."

"That would be great with school," I tell her and she nods in understanding.

"However, just remember if you start experiencing any symptoms to call me as soon as possible," She reminds me.

"Absolutely. You are sure I'm okay?" I asked feeling ecstatic.

"I am 100% sure," She laughs. "Hazel?"

"Hmm?" I look to her.

"Congratulations," She says as she hands me a card. "This is my card in case if you need to contact me."

"Thank you so much," I whisper as I gathered my oxygen tank to leave. The grin did not leave my face for the rest of the day because I was still kicking cancer's ass!

* * *

There you have it! Like I said this one was shorter than my last chapter, but promise to make it up.

So a lot of gooey feelings going on in here. Hehe. I am going to go as it is almost midnight where I live and I am fighting a super big sinus headache. UGH!

Enjoy while you read and please take your time to review if you don't mind

Laters!


	7. Chapter 6

Hi! I am back again! Two chapters in just so many days! What can I say? I love writing! I love it so so much! I write when I can! It is funny how this idea came as a seed in my mind and to see how it is shaping up!

I hope you enjoyed the last chapter!

Lets shall proceed!

* * *

Chapter 6

I rest of the day I treat myself of touring the wonderful city of Boston. I have been here many times before with my parents, but never just myself. It was refreshing change to be able to do something alone.

It was around four when I was ready return to Harvard. I was planning on doing some studying, but as it scratch an itch on my neck my fingers found the necklace that held my key to the sound room making me change my mind. I was going to do what I loved most: Songwriting! I have not had much time to write the last couple of weeks as I was not in the mood and getting to Harvard and I missed it! It was my fuel throughout life and my way of relaxing. So as soon as I stepped off the metro I walk to my dorm only stopping because my tank wheels got snag on a few notches in the path.

When I get to my dorm, I reach into the mini fridge, a gift from my parents, grabbed a Dr. Pepper and my songbook. I hoped the sound room was empty because I do my best work alone. I was somewhat worried about my partnership with Gus because I had never written with someone else and the fact that I have never shared one of my songs other than for the scholarship, which had to be sent in by video for judgement. I like to think I am a good singer and I love to do it, but I loved song writing a little more. It was my foundation on how I fell in love with music. I can sing now, but my parents would never let me in fear of it killing me, so I gave that part up.

Before I leave my room I make sure to check my levels on my tank. I have to make sure that I would not run out as I can get wrapped up in my writing and forget about everything else. I only need two liters per minute on my good days and on my bad days, mainly after my chemo sessions, could be up for four then that would require a hospital stay. Yes, chemo sucks ass!

As I was leaving my room I ran into Kaitlyn who was coming from her last class of the day. I am greeted my her lovely smile as she spots me.

"Hey girl," She greets warmly wrapping an arm around my shoulders.

"Hey yourself," I responding smiling back as she had the ability to pull a smile out even when your day had been awful.

"How was your day?" ask Kaitlyn with interest.

"It was wonderful because I was told that I am still in remission," I answer happily.

"That is great," She exclaimed clapping her hands. "Wait you had a doctor's appointment?"

"Yeah," I said turning to walk out the door with Kaitlyn walking with me.

"Why didn't you tell me?" She says turning to me. "I could have gone with you."

"I didn't want to bother you, besides it was early this morning," I reasoned with her.

"So? I'm here if you ever need me," She places a hand on my arm.

"I'll have to remember that," I nodded.

"You better, but now I have to go. I am meeting for a study group with people my class." She tells me. "I will see you later?"

"Of course," I answer as readjust the items in my arm before I dropped them as Kaitlyn turned to go to her room. I turn to go on my way to see Warner walking toward me before stopping a few inches from me.

"Where's your girlfriend?" I asked looking around.

"I came by myself," says Warner as he crosses his arm.

"What do you want?" I glare at him. I did not need him coming and destroying my wonderful day.

"I want to know when you are leaving?" he looks at me.

"Seriously?" I scoffed as walk around to continue on my way, but he reaches out grabbing a hold a of my arm.

"Ow," I hiss before yanking my arm away from his grasp. "What is your problem?"

"I want to know when you are leaving," He sneers. "What is it going to take?" The man I once knew was gone as I could see it in his icy eyes.

"There is nothing in this world that would make me leave." I bark as crossed my arms at him.

"What about 2 million dollars?" He asks holding up a paper check with that exact amount written out.

"You are bribing me to leave?" I scoff again at the pity of his antics.

"This should be more than enough for you to live on for many years to come," says Warner trying to make me see his point.

"What have I ever done to you?" I wondered.

"Nothing," He responds honestly.

"Then why do I have to leave?" I challenged. " I deserve to know why I would give everything I ever dreamed of up for 2 million dollars?"

"Vivian won't marry me unless you leave," says Warner looking down to the ground. "My family expects me to marry her and she won't take my hand because she is afraid that you will want me back."

I looked at him before until I hear this insane sound of laughter. It took me a second to realize that it was coming from me. I was laughing so hard that I had tears rolling down my cheeks and my lungs began to burn. As I tried to get myself under control I turned to look at him to only to laugh some more.

"Oh wow," I wheezed as I try to regain come more oxygen in my lungs. This has to be a dream because I could not believe the audacity of the sorry excuse for man that stood before me. How could I have not seen this sooner?

"Can I see the check?" I ask innocently holding out my hand.

"Here," says Warner as he let out a sigh of relief but he had another thing coming. I simply tear the check in half, then in to quarters then smaller and smaller before throwing the pieces at him.

"You know it would probably be best for Vivian not to marry you," I say loving the look of his shocked face as I could see the anger rolling around in his eyes. "She should get out before you drag her down."

I walk to stare deep in his eyes as tears filled mine. "As for you, you can go to hell." I shake my head as I turn away from him to go to the music room without looking back.

By the time I got to the room I was shaking so hard from anger no absolute fury! I did not know how to approach this because something tells me that I have not heard the last from him. Maybe I should tell someone but I did not want to be a bigger freak than I already was and my parents. Well they would probably scoop me up and chain me to my bedroom for the rest of my life.

Thankfully, I had the room to myself because I do not think I could handle another person's company at the moment. I took in the beautiful room before me with all the different instruments: a sleek black Baldwin piano, different kind of guitars, saxophone, tambourine and many more others. In front of me was a very large soundboard, much bigger than the one I had at home, that over looked the recording area. I felt like a girl in a department store looking at the hottest outfit. I walked over to the piano running my fingers along the keys pressing on them. I would come back to this baby later!

I take a seat in front of the soundboard that had a built in keyboard. I started playing around with different buttons on the board rewarding me with a flat angry sound, but I did not care. I was on cloud nine! I had to shake myself from my haze to focus on my task at hand so I get out my song book and I opened to the last song I wrote which was about the bastard ex boyfriend.

I read over the lyrics touching them up here and there, as I needed. I then placed my fingers on the keys pressing a few chords until I find a melody that matched well with the words. I looked around to make sure there was no one to hear me sing as I slipped on a pair of headphones as I started to record the song:

" _Should have know by the way you passed me by_

 _There was something in your eye_

 _And it wasn't right_

 _I should have walked but I never had the chance_

 _Everything got out of hand and I let it slide_

 _Now I only have myself to blame_

 _For falling for your stupid games_

 _I wish my life could be the way it was before_

 _I saw you face"_

I take a deep breath as I have learned to do so while singing. I know from experience that I can sing if given the chance without any problems from my lungs, but that is my little secret. I hit a few new keys pacing up the tempo a bit for the chorus:

" _You stole my happy_

 _You made me cry_

 _You took the lonely and took me for a ride_

 _And I wanna un un un un undo it_

 _You had my heart now I want it back_

 _I am starting to see everything you lack_

 _Boy you blew it_

 _You put me through it_

 _I wanna un un un un undo it_

 _Na na na na na_

 _Na na na na na_

 _Na na na na na na"_

I stop to look at the lyrics as I have a idea of change for the next verse of the song so I grab my pencil and I begin to rearrange a few word here and there until I was satisfied with the results. I turned back to the keyboard to pick up where I left off. I pull out my phone to see the time I was wanting to see if Gus wanted to come help, but it was only 5:30 and sigh out loud. I had thirty minutes until I could see him again and I really wanted too. I shake my head trying to get rid myself of those feelings. I don't know why I wanted to see him. I didn't want to him false pretenses that I was interested him as I only just got out of a relationship. What if I were to relapse? I could not do that that to someone. I don't even know how I had not seen Warner for who he truly was. And that was an asshole and that is all I see now. I return my focus back to my song so I could get it finished before I left here.

" _Now your photos don't have a picture frame_

 _And I never say your name and I never will_

 _And all your things well I threw them in the trash_

 _And I'm not even sad_

 _Now you only have yourself to blame_

 _For playing all those stupid games_

 _You're always going to be the same_

 _Oh no you'll never change"_

I smile as the sound of the words take flight into this world as I really get into the song.

" _You stole my happy_

 _You made me cry_

 _You took the lonely and took me for a ride_

 _And I wanna un un un un undo it_

 _You had my heart now I want it back_

 _I am starting to see everything you lack_

 _Boy you blew it_

 _You put me through it_

 _I wanna un un un un undo it"_

I take a breath as I head into my favorite part of the song.

" _You want my future you can't have it_

 _Still trying to erase you from past_

 _I need gone so fast"_

 _Chorus 2x_

When I finished the last bit of the song, I took a moment to listen the whole thing. I was pleased with my finished project, so I take the CD that recorded and put it in a sleeve where I would take it back to my dorm and put it in my lock box with all my others songs. I know no one will ever here them but I make them so if I were to lose my cancer battle that my parents will something left to remember me by. I place it in my bag as I pull out my phone to see what time to read 7:30. Wow time really flies when one is having fun, but I quickly find myself hitting finding Gus' name opening my message box.

I type:

Do you feel like working on some songs? I hit send. It was not 30 seconds later when I got his reply.

I read:

G: Hazel Grace, I thought you said you were going to call not text.

I roll my eyes cursing him for remembering that little detail, but nonetheless I hit the call button. He picks up after one ring.

"That is much better Hazel Grace," He says and I can hear the smile in voice.

"Hello Augustus Waters. So back to the original question-" I begin, but I am cut off by a loud and painful cry. "What 's that? Are you okay?" I asked concerned.

"Me? I'm excellent. I am however, with Isaac," He explains as the crying became almost unbearable to listen to as it made my own heart clench for him. "Isaac is it okay if Hazel comes over? Isaac focus on me!" Gus tried before. "How fast can you get here?" He asks hopelessly to me.

"I don't know where your dorm is," I say.

"We're in Chester Hall second floor third room on the left," says Gus. "Isaac don't do that-" the line is disconnected leaving me staring at my phone and I quickly gather my stuff making sure to lock the place up as I leave.

It turns out the Chester hall was only a few buildings away from my own dorm. The building was a bit larger than mine with a larger student common room. It was set with TVs, a pool table, computers, stations, several couches, and chairs. I was actually slightly jealous of it all. I noticed an elevator but there was a big sign that said: OUT OF ORDER so I eyed the staircase with trepidation as it was about 8 or 9 steps to the top. For a normal person it would be a breeze, but for me it would like running a large marathon. So pick up my tank, placing the strap over my shoulder, and I start the slow treacherous climb with my hand on the railing one-step at a time.

After several minutes I reached the top only to sit down to catch my breath as my lungs were burning for oxygen from the extra work. I was ready for bed after that climb. I wipe light sheen of sweat from my brow. Once I was able to catch my breath I got up and went in search of the room I sought. From one of the rooms I could hear very loud off key singing as well as gunshots of a video came. I went with my gut and knocked on the door. A few seconds later Gus answers the door.

"Hazel Grace," He smiles as I see his shoulders drop in relief.

"Should I worry?" I asked.

"Come on in," He says as he steps aside to let me enter into a very large room. There was a full size bed, a desk with a laptop and a bunch of books. A flat screen TV with two gamer chairs in front of it, one occupied by Isaac. There was a bookcase filled with many books that could give my collection a run for their money. It made me smile as I turn to Gus who was watching me worriedly.

"Are you okay?" He searches my face as he places a hand on my cheek.

"Yeah," I nod. "It was the stairs."

"I'm sorry," He says quickly. "I forgot that they were doing maintenance on it." He looked down ashamed.

"I am fine," I smile as placed a comforting hand on his shoulder. "I promise."

"Okay," He smiles.

"Okay," I repeated before turning to Isaac. "Hi Isaac."

"Isaac is in midst of a psychotic episode right now," Gus explains gently as I sit on the floor in front of Isaac.

"Ah," I say as I put a hand on Isaac's knee. "Hey Isaac."

"Hey Hazel," He sniffs as he removes the headphones.

"What's going on?" I ask.

"Monica broke up with me," He say brokenly.

"Tell her why," says Gus with disgust in his voice.

"I found out today that I there is cancer in my good eye and it will have to be removed," He sniffs sounding defeated.

"Oh Isaac," I murmur. "I am so sorry." I shake my head in anger when I get to keep living when so many great people lose so much.

"So I told Monica and she broke up with me on the spot," He sobs. "She says she can't handle it. I am about to lose my eyesight and she is the one that can't handle it."

"That girl is a piece of work," says Augustus as it takes a seat in the other chair.

"So now all I want to is cry and to play video games," sighs Isaac as he turned on the game.

"You know it would help if you had any sage words of feminine advice that would be helpful," prods Gus looking to at me.

"I think his response if fairly appropriate," I answer nodding at Isaac who was currently being ambushed in the game.

"Pain demands to be felt" quotes Gus making me look at him.

"Did you just quote An Imperial Affliction?" I ask sounding surprised.

"You heard of it?" ask Gus with interest.

"Heard of it? It is my favorite novel," I tell him. "I think I have read it at least 100 times if not more."

"Really?" says Gus. "I thought I was the only who ever read it. I hate ending thought. The ending is just evil."

"I felt as if it was more truthful than evil. I mean you die right in the middle of life in the middle of a sentence. I mean it doesn't get any more real than that." I say.

"Always!" cries out Isaac making us jump as he violently kills a few bodies on the screen. "I kept saying "always" to her, but she kept talking over me as it never meant anything to her. Like…It was like I was gone already you know." He broke down in to tears again.

"Sometimes people don't understand the promises that they making," I soothed as I catch Augustus' eye as he nodded in agreement as we share a secret smile

"I still have her necklace," He says playing with the charm on it.

"Take it off," I offer. "If she can't keep her promises then why do you?"

"Dude take that off," says Gus as well.

Isaac looks at the both us as he considers our words and then he is tugging at the chain until we hear satisfying snap as it broke in half. He tossed it away as it was full of bad electric currents.

"Yeah, there you go!" I clap as Gus picks up another controller.

"Really Gus?" Isaac says. "Not the children again?!"

"Children?" I asked confused as I watch the two on the game. I recognized it as I game I used to play when I was laid up in bed for months at a time.

"Mr. Hero here always like to save the children," Isaac groans as I watch the two fight the oncoming assaults of the enemy army.

"The children must be save!" exclaims Gus as he pounds the button on the controller.

"Why don't you go the other way?" I say aloud.

"What way?" asks Gus. "There is no other way."

"Yes there is," I say. "Why are the children so important anyway?"

"Children are the future," says Gus.

"Gus it's a game," I point out.

"The Price of Dawn is a way of life!" He says shocked.

"Still its easier to go back the other way," I said again.

"Which way?" He looks confused as Isaac laughs at our whole argument.

"Give me the controller," I demanded my hand out as Gus cautiously sets the piece in my hand.

"You better not kill me," He warns.

"I won't," I smirk as I send his player back the way I know.

"You are going the wrong way!" Gus shouts as I bullets start raining down on me, but I made my character hide until my health was out of the red.

"I am not," I say as I shoot back taking out three opponents before advancing onward.

"You can't go this way!" says Gus as he hides his face in his hands.

"Have you ever gone this way?" I ask not taking my eyes of the screen.

"No," He shakes his head as he watches nervously.

"Okay then! Watch and learn," I laugh as I fire. "There are more places for you to hide that you can use to your advantage." I say as I hide behind a car as I fire more.

"I still think you are going the wrong way," says Gus.

"I am not," I say as I turn the corner to be ambushed by a tank.

"YOU CAN'T KILL MAX MAYEHM!" shouts Gus.

"Shh!" I shush him making him pout, which was the cutest face I had ever seen from him. I twist and turn and soon I was at the schoolhouse. "See?"

"How? I never knew you could go that way?" says Gus as Isaac cheers me on.

"I know this game like the back of my hand," I smile at him and he just stares at me.

"So why the children?" I ask as I battle on a full assault of gunfire. I throw grenades a few moments with them taking out some of the threat. "Even thought you can't save the children in this game."

"You still bought them some time," says Gus as he reaches to take the controller back, but I was not having it!

"It was only temporarily," I pointed out my eyes back on the screen.

"All salvation is temporarily," Gus shoots back. "You bought them a minute and maybe that minute turns into an hour which can in turn buy them a year. No one's gonna buy them forever, because nothing is forever, but you bought them that minute. And that is not nothing. It is what I call a hero."

"It's only a game," I blush as I relish his words as I turn back to the screen, but was please nonetheless.

"Something tells me you have played this game before," He lifts an eyebrow at me.

"I have. I mean something had to keep me going through chemo," I laugh as I finally reach the checkpoint in the game as I press pause.

"Chemo?" says Gus looking at me. "You been through chemo?"

"Yeah," I say softly. "I have, but that's another story for another day." I did not want to talk about my status with cancer when Isaac just learned that his had returned. That would be like a slap in his face and I did not want to appear insensitive of his feelings

"It's okay if you talk about it," says Isaac as if he knew what was going on in my mind.

"Maybe another day." I smile at him. "I really don't like talking about it. Okay?"

"Okay," says Gus. "Do you have secrets about this game I don't know?"

"I guess we'll have to see," I smile at him.

"Challenge accepted!" says Gus as Isaac laughs as I scoot back settling in between the two boys as I make myself comfortable and this is where I sat until I left with a stomach ache from laughing so hard at one in the morning because I had class the morning. As I turn my light of I fell asleep to the memory of a smile in mind. That smile belonged to Augustus Waters.

* * *

Oh goodness! That is a lot of words! I hope everyone enjoys this lovely chapter! It was a blast writing as always and I can not wait to write some more.

I hope I can establish a friendship between Isaac and Hazel. There is nothing romantic between Isaac, but I want them to have a friendship like Rachel and Kurt of Glee.

So we have a little fluff between Gus and Hazel, but I don't want rush into it as Hazel is a little guarded somewhat.

The song I used: Undo it by Carrie Underwood. I know I used it a previous chapter, but I wanted to show case her song writing a little as it is important to this plot. There will be more songs later down the road.

Well until next time!


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